I have hemmed and hawed, gone backwards and forwards and sideways, compared notes with my assistant judge, eaten some cookies, chosen, second-guessed, re-chosen, further consulted with my assistant judge (which may or may not have involved more cookies...), third-guessed, hemmed and hawed some more...
Would you just look at me this morning?!
Man this was tough! So many terrific entries! How to choose?
Well, I'll tell you.
Criteria number one was tied between child-friendliness and creativity (since the contest was for a children's story about a very creative or unique birthday.) Several entries ended up not being chosen because either the topic seemed more appealing to adults, or the writing felt a little too adult, and several others ended up not being chosen because they just didn't feel quite unique enough. Criteria number two was quality of writing. A couple of entries had mistakes in basic grammar, word usage etc, and a couple others needed a bit more work on rhyme/rhythm/meter. Although there were MANY other entries we could have chosen for one reason or another, we tried to pick the ones that really did the best overall job with all three criteria.
So. Without further ado, here are the 6 finalists, listed by number and title only in case that helps you be objective :)
#1 A Gift Of Love
Kayla sat by her twin sister Kenya’s
side and held her hand. It was their tenth birthday and the celebration
was going to be very low key. Kenya couldn’t take too much
excitement. She was very weak from the chemo treatments. Her head
was covered with a soft, knitted hat because her glorious mane of red hair had
fallen out. She was as pale as her hospital sheets.
Weak and sick as she was, Kenya was
able to dredge up a fit of blazing anger directed at her sister. “What
have you done? Why have you had your hair cut off?” she spluttered.
She was simply furious. The twins crowning glory was their hair and they
took care every day to style it identically. Kayla now had a short pixie
style hair cut.
Kayla just smiled, offered no
explanation, and simply handed her sister a gaily wrapped birthday gift.
“Happy birthday Ken.” She said and slipped quietly out of her sisters
hospital room.
Kenya, puzzled, opened her gift and
then broke down in tears of joy and shame over having spoken to her twin so
harshly.
When Kayla came back in the room
Kenya was propped up in bed and her hairdo was the mirror image of her
sisters. “Thank you.” She said softly. “This is the best birthday
gift I have ever had or will likely ever have again. I love you.”
#2 A Present For A Pirate
Lundy the hound
and Captain Saltsam
Were pirates
aboard the vast ship Crusty Clam.
On Saltsam’s big
birthday, he had one desire:
A colorful bird
for his pirate attire.
Lundy decided to
cast out their net
And catch
Saltsam’s present, the best ever yet.
After sailing
around, Lundy pulled in the haul:
Some driftwood, a
buoy, a flattened beach ball.
Snared in the net
lay a sopping sea bird,
“A parrot?” asked
Lundy. “Now don’t be absurd!
I’m a puffin!
Release me!” the cranky bird snapped.
“I’ve no place on
a ship, and I won’t be bird-napped!”
“Hush up, pesky
puffin! Behave and pipe down.
You’re a pirate’s
bird now. Eat crackers and frown!
Happy birthday
dear Captain!” said the gift-bearing hound,
“A bird for your
shoulder! Here – wear him around!”
The bird thrashed
his feet and swung with his beak,
He flapped his
strong wings, smacking Sam on the cheek.
He wiggled and wobbled
and shrieked in alarm,
Then lifting his
tail, pooped down Saltsam’s arm.
“Yuck!” yelled
the captain. “Get off me! Goodbye!”
The puffin leaned
over and nipped Saltsam’s eye.
Lundy was
crushed, gave a low mournful howl.
“I’m sorry I gave
you that terrible fowl.”
“Oh well!” said
the captain. “I don’t need a bird.
I can see now
quite clearly my wish was absurd.
The present I
want isn’t one we can catch.
With this nifty
new boo-boo, I want an eye patch!”
#3 Not Another Birthday!
Billy hated his birthdays,
every single one of them. The day was always a complete disaster. One time, on
Billy’s seventh birthday, most of his party guests ended up in the emergency
room! In fact, none of Billy’s friends will come to his parties anymore. Only
Billy’s relatives show up because they have to.
Things usually
start off pretty well. The guests arrive with smiles on their faces, carrying
presents in colorful paper. There’s lots of ”Hi’s”, hugs and “How are
you’s?” Everyone puts their party hats on. There’s pizza for dinner,
and games like guess the wizard, and pin the drawbridge on the castle.
Then comes the
cake. Billy’s dad carries it in. This year it has twelve candles on it,
brightly lit with flames dancing in the air. Billy notices it is an ice cream
cake, “UGH!” He says to himself. “Even WORSE!”
The cake is
placed on the table in front of Billy; all the guests cower behind their chairs
and under the table as they nervously sing “Happy Birthday to You” in hushed
voices. As Billy listened to the song, getting ready to blow out the candles,
he thought to himself, “This makes no sense for a fire-breathing dragon.”
#4 Birthday At The Beach
Mom hung up the phone just as Kara
finished dinner.
“Grab your jacket,” Mom said,
grinning. “We’re going to a birthday party.”
“Whose birthday? We don’t know
anyone here,” said Kara. She searched for her jacket among the moving boxes
that had arrived, like they had, only three days ago.
“It’s a surprise,” said Mom.
“Where’s the party?” asked Kara,
climbing into the car.
“At the beach,” said Mom. “I told
you it would be great to live near the beach.”
“But it’s almost dark!”
Mom smiled.
“Will there be cake?”
“Nope.”
A birthday party at the beach, in
the dark, with no cake?
At the beach, a small crowd had
gathered. Coming closer, Kara saw that the crowd surrounded a rope-marked path
from the dunes toward the water. For a birthday party, it sure was quiet.
“Watch that patch of sand,”
whispered Mom, pointing. Kara stared through the growing darkness. She thought
she saw the sand shift. Then it shifted again, slowly, and then more rapidly.
To Kara, it looked like a pot of water beginning to simmer. A small black head
appeared, then another, then a flipper, and suddenly the sand boiled over with
tiny creatures struggling toward the surface.
“Turtles!” Mom whispered, squeezing
Kara’s hand. Dozens of baby sea turtles flip-flopped their way across the sand
toward the waves. A woman with a clipboard counted them. The crowd remained
still, but once in a while someone stooped to gently guide a wandering baby
turtle back to the path.
They’re brave, Kara thought,
watching the tiny creatures make their way into the vast ocean, a place they
had never been and could know nothing about.
“Happy birthday,” Kara whispered, then smiled at Mom. “I
think I’m going to like living near the beach,” she said.
#5 Dan's Birthday Plan
Dan had to stop Christmas. It was
the only way his birthday would be normal. Every year, he celebrated Christmas
one day and on the next his birthday.
As Mom announced time for dinner,
Dan jumped in.
“We can’t have Christmas. If we do,
my birthday will be ruined.”
Dan knew the reason for the season,
but his Christmas and birthday presents always had a part missing.
“Christmas always splits my
birthday,” Dan said.
“It doesn’t,” Mom said. “That’s
your special day. This is another one.”
“Why did I get arrows on Christmas
Day and a bow on my birthday?” Dan asked.
“They were two separate gifts,” his
sister Sue said.
“One year, I got multi-colored
pencils for Christmas. I had nothing to write on until paper arrived on my
birthday,” Dan said.
“You had to sharpen the pencils,”
cousin Bobby said reaching for a roll.
“The leather baseball glove,” Dan
said.
“What was wrong with that?” Dad
asked.
“I couldn’t play catch until my
birthday. That’s when you gave me a baseball.”
Grandma put her arms around Dan.
“We don’t need to cancel Christmas
or your birthday. We’ll celebrate both with no missing parts — right Mom and
Dad?”
His parents agreed and they all sat
down to eat.
During the gift exchange, Dan tore
the Christmas paper and opened the box to find one tennis shoes.
“Oops,” Mom said. She left and
returned with a birthday package. Dan opened the box. He beamed holding the
shoes. “A pair of shoes for Christmas!“
“Everything worked out,” Grandma
said. “Now are you ready for your birthday?”
“Yes,” Dan said and noticed a jar
of jelly in his stocking. “Who knows what I’ll get for my birthday.”
#6 The Biggest And The Best
Scott
only wanted the biggest and best. For his fourth birthday, Scott’s
parents rented a pony.
Scott
asked, “No elephant?”
For
his fifth birthday, his grandmother baked a five layer cake.
Scott
said, “I wanted ten layers.”
For
his sixth birthday, his brother bought him the all the Super-Robo-Thunder-Team
figurines.
Scott
asked, “Where’s the Super-Robo-Volcano–Lair play set?”
So
Scott figured his seventh birthday was going to be just like all his other
ones—just okay.
To
his surprise, dad said, “We decided to get you something bigger and better than
anything you have ever gotten!”
“What
is it?”
Dad
said, “You’ll find out tomorrow.”
Scott
thought of all the big, best things he wanted. “They know I want an
airplane, but where to put it?
“Maybe
it will be my own personal movie theater.
“Maybe
a submarine! I told my mom this week I wanted one!”
Scott
was nearly unable to sleep. Tomorrow was going to be better than
Christmas and 4th of July combined.
At
the party, he passed on the games. He devoured dinner in two bites.
Scott blew out the cake candles before the singing was over.
“Alright!
Where are my presents?”
Dad
gave him a card. “Open it, son. Congratulations.”
Inside
was a certificate:
Scott,
A
heavenly gift from The Star Registry Society.
Your
Star’s Coordinates: GSC 4628:237
love,
Your family
“WHAT!?!”
“It’s
something big,” said grandfather.
“The
star we picked is twice as massive as the sun,” said mother.
“WHAT!?!”
“And
you wanted the best,” said uncle.
“There’s
not much better than something that spews fire and is billions of years
old,” said aunt.
“But…
“I
see you are speechless. So let me also show you your new telescope.
It’s outside, ready to find your star,” said dad.
They
went out to see the biggest and the best.
And I just have to say we had a particularly hard time finally laying aside Bailey Bear's Birthday Band (by Laura), Happy Birthday Seahorse (by Wendy), Mouse Du Jour (by Penny), The Birthday Giving (by Sabrina), and No Brother For My Birthday (by Vivian).
But really, all the entries were terrific, there were things we really liked about all of them, and you all did such a fantastic job. You are all winners by virtue of the fact that you wrote stories that met the guidelines and entered the contest. They say 90% of success is showing up (or something like that :)) - well, you all showed up! And I know I speak for everyone when I say how much we all enjoyed your work!
And now, if you could all please vote for your favorite between now and 11:59 PM EDT Wednesday May 30 (I extended it a little because I want to make sure everyone has time to vote!) I will announce the 1st, 2nd, and 3rd Place Winners on Friday after the Perfect Picture Book!
I really cannot wait to see how the voting shapes up!
Yeah, we really wrestled with that one... leaving me fourth-guessing this morning...! :) Maybe next time I'll just post all the entries and let the decision be made entirely by the voters! :)
ReplyDeleteWow. I loved to read these. I am dying to be writing more. I really wanted to submit mine, but my fear overwhelms me. I am going to have to drop the fear and take some risks. I am so glad to have found your site and to be a part of PPBF. I want to be more involved with writers and the writing life. Thank you so much for all that you do to make it all more accessible. There are some amazing ideas and writers out there.
ReplyDeleteKimberley
First in Maine
Oh, how you must have agonized. You are such a nice purrson, though I have seen you look better:-) Great job in selecting the winning entries. Now go have a cat nap!
ReplyDeleteI made it to the finals. For me, that's being a winner. Thank you so much. All the stories were so good. I certainly don't envy you the job of choosing. When the dust settles maybe everyone could pop over to thefeatherednest and enter the Words of June contest there.
ReplyDeleteDelores
Wow, trying to choose is like trying to decide which child I love best. They are all wonderful stories.
ReplyDeleteI know. It's like Sophie's Choice. Only worse because there are 6. And that's not even counting all the others I already had to let go!
ReplyDeleteI have to say, I'm finding it very interesting watching the votes come in. They are not falling as I would have predicted!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for entering, Tracy! I loved your sweet entry. And thank you for complimenting my hair :)
ReplyDeleteTracy Campbell wrote, in response to Susanna Leonard Hill:
Congratulations to the six finalists. I'll be sure to vote. And thank you, Susanna for running a terrific contest. Love your hairdo.
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Congrats on making it to the finals! You wrote a great story! And I will have to come right over and check out Words of June!
ReplyDeleteGreat job of picking Susanna! You really don't look like yourself....these contests are taking a toll on you for sure!
ReplyDeleteNow you did such a great job of picking that I have gone through twice and can't decide. I think I'll go do a few chores and then come back...but I will decide and I will vote.
Thanks for doing the contests! It is always so much fun to see all the creativity!
Yoda! I knew it was you all along! Choices well made, to all good luck. Voting difficult you say? "You must feel the Force around you; here, between you, me, the tree, the rock, everywhere, yes!" Thanks Susanna, much fun this is!
ReplyDeleteI struggled between two of the entries but finally cast my vote. Good luck to all the finalists!
ReplyDeleteGreat stories! It was hard to pick. Happy writing, everyone!
ReplyDeleteI think we are all glad you had the job of picking the top 6, Susanna...but now you've put the final choice in our laps...and it is not an easy one! I, too, will have to come back to vote and reread them all...visualizing them each as an actual picture book. :) Congrats to all who entered...a plethora (hahaha...another BIG word) of great ideas!
ReplyDeleteWell at least I had a bath, although it looks like maybe it wasn't by choice :) Thanks for pondering and voting. It was a very tough choice.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you enjoyed the contest and hope you'll be back for more, Sabrina! I did really like your entry! It's a terrible job being the judge :) And as in all things creative, one person's "yes" may be another person's "no" and vice versa. You did a great job. Thanks for entering!
ReplyDeleteI would have enjoyed the cookies, but not the judging on this one. I enjoyed reading them all.
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed reading them too, Stacy, and it was VERY hard choosing the final 6. I'm still second-guessing! But we did have a time limit after all. Good thing or I might never have picked :)
ReplyDeleteFor voting I thank you, Julie. But the Force deserted me it did on this one!
ReplyDeleteThank you for voting, Kerry!
ReplyDeleteWell, that was a further complication because technically the guidelines were for a children's story, not a PB, so illustration potential was not a deciding factor. As you can see from the finalists, one story is a little old for PB (possibly) and I would say as many as 3 of them might not sustain 32 pages of pictures. Ah, it was tough!!!
ReplyDeleteWell thank YOU for participating and voting!!! :)
ReplyDeleteThanks for coming by and reading, Eric!
ReplyDeleteWell it was a hard deciscion...but I voted :)
ReplyDeleteGood luck to all the paticipants...your stories were great!
Thanks so much for reading and voting, Kathy!
ReplyDeleteIt was so hard to choose - but I did! Congrats to all the finalists!!
ReplyDeleteI'm not even going to tell you...okay, I will. Given the fab stories you have here for us to choose from, I'd have to say you actually look rather well. If it were me, I'm sure the pic would resemble a frazzled cat, fur completely askew and pointing every which way but the right way, eyes bulging, paralyzed on my back. Yeah, a mess of all messes lol!!! Voted my choice after much hair-pulling debating.
ReplyDeleteThat cat looks like me in the morning. :(
ReplyDeleteCongrats everyone who entered and made it to the final round!!! I can't imagine how difficult it was to narrow it down to these six.
Wow, voting was tough! There were two I found hard to separate but I've made my decision. Congrats to everyone who made the final six!
ReplyDeleteP.S. I love that photo of 'you', Susanna! ;-)
Thanks for voting, Lori, and congrats to you too for an excellent entry! :)
ReplyDeleteThanks for voting, and if your debate involved hair-pulling you probably look a lot like me :)
ReplyDeleteIt was practically impossible! I'm still feeling particularly bad about a couple we cut. I love the contests, but the judging is HARD! Thanks for reading and voting. Now go comb your hair :)
ReplyDeleteThanks, Penny, and thanks for voting and for your very excellent entry! The contests are so fun, but the judging is hard. It gives me an appreciation for editors. You can't pick everything, and depending on your criteria at the moment (the guidelines of the contest or what your list needs) you have to set aside some great stories.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for reading and voting, Irene!
ReplyDeleteI voted! Yay for great entries. And I'm going to keep the image of that cat face in my head for the rest of the day. LOL!
ReplyDeleteOh dear...hope the catnip cocktails weren't too strong. You still look beautiful to me!
ReplyDeleteSo many terrific entries celebrating birthdays of all sorts. My nephew enjoyed having several these read aloud for his special day! Congrats to all the entrants, the finalists, and to the judges who wrestled with their task. Great job!
Yikes, that was a hard choice.
ReplyDeleteGood luck to all! And congratulations for taking up the challenge and running with it!
ReplyDeleteJust voted! Great entries!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Julie!
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for reading and voting, Laura!
ReplyDeleteTellin' me! Next time maybe I'll have a contest where everybody wins - I'll have categories for Best Character, Best Plot, Most Original Word Usage etc. until everyone wins :)
ReplyDeleteAaahh! That was hard. But fun. Thanks for hosting another great contest!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Cathy! (And I'm especially glad you think my hairdo is beautiful :))
ReplyDeletePoor kitteh! :)
ReplyDeleteThank YOU for reading, commenting and voting! :)
ReplyDeleteThank you for voting, and thank you for commenting on my extreme beauty :)
ReplyDeleteI try :)
ReplyDeleteI know! It's a really tough decision! And I'm still sweating over a couple of the ones I cut!
ReplyDeleteI hope you're impressed with my awesome 'do! And your entry deserved to be a finalist - very clever :)
ReplyDeleteIt's a tough job, Miss Punster, and I think maybe you should help me next time :) Then we can both look like this :)
ReplyDeleteGreat job to all the writers! I just voted, it was hard.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for voting, Darshana!
ReplyDeleteExcellent choices for the finalists! I would have had a hard time laying aside Vivian's story, too. It had me chuckling out loud. Thank you for hosting another great contest.
ReplyDeleteAiyiyi. The one I was sure I was going to vote for is here...but now my eye is wandering. Oh fickle me! I have to ponder, and will be back later to vote.
ReplyDeleteCongrats to all the finalists and to EVERYONE who entered. These were such fun to read. :)
Congratulations to the six finalists. I'll be sure to vote. And thank you, Susanna for running a terrific contest. Love your hairdo.
ReplyDeleteIt seems that the bar is raised higher every time you have a competition, Susanna, an your job becomes harder. Congratulations to ALL who entered and well done to you six finalists. I hesitated a wee while, but have cast my vote.
ReplyDeleteI didn't know you had a triple mohawk this morning! ;)
ReplyDeleteI must say, I had a hard time picking a favorite, but I did ;)
Thank you for picking mine for the finals! Good luck finalists! :)
Loved the finalists, but it was easy for me to make my choice. :) And what do you mean about looking frazzled? You look gorgeous!
ReplyDeleteGreat stories everyone! Good luck to all of you!
ReplyDeleteI liked Birthday At The beach because it was the most different from other birthday stories and it had something interesting happening that could go into a science lesson.
ReplyDeleteThanks for coming over and reading and voting, Lisa! And yes, I love that one too. There were so many great stories - very hard to choose! Maybe you'd like to be a judge next time and help me :)
ReplyDeleteOK, I went away for a few hours to ponder and just came back. I voted, but I won't say I'm happy about it! Tough choice.
ReplyDeleteAnd really, Susanna, at least wear a bandanna and trim your whiskers when people are coming over.
Congratulations to all the finalists!!! I thought there were soooo many good stories and I felt very happy to read you had a slightly hard time to set aside my story :-) I think such contestst, along with the challenges (piboidmo, 12x12), are great to get the creative juices running, not only because it gets us to work, but also because we get inspired by reading so many other good stories. It forces us to keep up and become better writers, make some real writing friends along the way!!! So thanks to everyone :-)
ReplyDeleteI voted (are you SURE I can't come back and vote for ALL of them) but I want to say that each of these stories would make an amazing children's picture book! I hope all six authors will follow through with them and submit them somewhere for publication...they are unique and appealing and WONDERFUL! Thank you, Susanna, for hosting these contests that inspire us to produce such great work. :)
ReplyDelete