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April 22, 2015

Would You Read It Wednesday #171 - Monster Bakery (PB) PLUS Straight From The Editor x 2!!!

Well, hello there!  Fancy meeting you here!

Oh, right!  You're here for the chocolate.

We'll get to that in a sec.

First, I have to tell you what a big week it's been here at the Hill Homestead.  I have been to Pennsylvania, Connecticut, Massachusetts, and Vermont.  I celebrated the 21st anniversary of my 29th birthday and joined the half-century club.  My husband and I celebrated our silver wedding anniversary.  And Princess Blue Kitty has a headlight that is almost out!

I know!

Not every week is that chock-full of love, travel, adventure, drama, and the knife-edge of danger (what if a policeman sees us before our beloved Subaru mechanic gets back from vacation to replace Blue's headlight???!!!  Edge-of-your-seat thrill ride - that's the way we roll around here!)

A week like this gives me a chance to pause and reflect (whilst driving), to look at all the blessings in my life and be grateful, and to think holy swiss cheese, Batman, when did I get so OLD?! :)

All this by way of saying if I owe you an email or haven't commented on your blog or etc., etc., that's why.  Blame it on senility :)

Now then, first on today's agenda we have Straight From The Editor for both February and March!

February - you will recall Kirsten's winning pitch for Finley vs. The Fly (PB ages 4-8)
When a pesky fly fixes his eye on Finley’s peanut butter and jelly sandwich, the game is on. Armed with a magazine, vacuum cleaner, and sink sprayer, Finley is determined to deliver a final blow to the buzz. But when Finley serves up the final swat and the fly lands — splat — on the sandwich, Finley wonders whether he’s really won after all.
Editor Erin Molta had this to say:

I really like the potential action of Finley vs. the Fly. However, Finley wondering whether he won after all is a bit of a downer and nobody likes a fly. Finley needs to be the victor in this story and it seems as if he’s not.

March - you will recall Carrie's winning pitch for Stepping Into Adventure: The Magic Rocks (PB ages 4-8)
Stepping Into Adventure: The Magic Rocks is the story of Jude, a boy who is on a quest to find adventure because boredom has captured him.  He discovers he cannot escape his suddenly dull days without the help of his step-mom.  This results in high-flying adventure and a discovery that they are even better together.  
For this one, Erin said:

This sounds interesting but you need to tie in the beginning and the last sentence.  A discovery that Jude and his stepmom are even better together implies that he thought they weren’t and that seems to be more a problem than boredom. Perhaps if you started the pitch with something like, Jude’s new step mom took some getting used to but Jude is incredibly bored…and then perhaps make it so that his step mom gives him some adventurous ideas. Then it becomes a family story with more of a hook than just alleviating boredom.

As always, I find Erin's comments very enlightening (thank you, Erin!), and I hope Kirsten and Carrie will find her thoughts helpful!

Now then.  You've been very patient.  And now your patience shall be rewarded.  It's time for everybody's favorite snack: Something Chocolate!!!

http://www.bonappetit.com/recipe/chocolate-brownie-cookies
Really, when the name is Chocolate Brownie Cookies you just need to grab a cup of coffee or a glass of milk and dive in :)  (With many thanks to the lovely Teresa who supplied this deliciousness.  There was a rumor that Renee was going to test the recipe, but results have not been reported in! :))

Onward!

Today's pitch comes to us from Pat who says, "As an established food writer and cookbook author, my food obsession spills over into my children’s writing. I love reading and writing picture books, and am especially attracted to stories that have clever punch lines and subterfuge, diverse characters and themes are a bonus!  
Find me at--
Blog: Picklesandtea.org link
Twitter: @ediblewords 
Here is her pitch:

Working Title: Monster Bakery
Age/Genre: Picture Book (ages 4-8)
The Pitch: Esme and her parents run The Ghoulangerie, a popular bakery in their neighborhood. Every day, maggot and mince meat pies, booger bagels with brain cheese, and bloody orange cupcakes fly off the shelves. However, the neighborhood is changing and their regular customers soon stop coming in. To bring in new customers, Esme comes up with a three-step plan: tweak their recipes, change their opening hours, and advertise. Nothing’s working until a crisis encourages Esme to push the limits of her creativity.

So what do you think?  Would You Read It?  YES, MAYBE or NO?

If your answer is YES, please feel free to tell us what you particularly liked and why the pitch piqued your interest.  If your answer is MAYBE or NO, please feel free to tell us what you think could be better in the spirit of helping Pat improve her pitch.  Helpful examples of possible alternate wordings are welcome.  (However, I must ask that comments be constructive and respectful.  I reserve the right not to publish comments that are mean because that is not what this is about.)

Please send YOUR pitches for the coming weeks!  For rules and where to submit, click on this link Would You Read It or on the Would You Read It tab in the bar above.  There are openings in September so you've got a little time to polish up your pitches and send yours for your chance to be read by editor Erin Molta!

Pat is looking forward to your thoughts on her pitch!  I am looking forward to watching the grass turn green.  It's happening folks! :)

Have a wonderful Wednesday, everyone!!! :)


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