tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1007703247358638748.post1987705218365911067..comments2024-02-25T10:47:13.049-05:00Comments on Susanna Leonard Hill: Would You Read It Wednesday - The 44th PitchSusanna Leonard Hillhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17655630528649780363noreply@blogger.comBlogger63125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1007703247358638748.post-40431778225677925352012-06-26T06:31:04.437-04:002012-06-26T06:31:04.437-04:00Thanks for the comment, Anna!Thanks for the comment, Anna!Susanna Leonard Hillhttp://susannahill.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1007703247358638748.post-31810486607169835272012-06-25T15:49:21.799-04:002012-06-25T15:49:21.799-04:00Yes, I would read it! I think this book would inte...Yes, I would read it! I think this book would interest children to see how these two different animals can come together. If the illustrations were vibrant that would pull a reader into choosing the book, too!Anna Churchhttp://www.hugabugtravels.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1007703247358638748.post-9556667903370476022012-06-18T04:31:00.278-04:002012-06-18T04:31:00.278-04:00I feel a little better if someone who has loved in...I feel a little better if someone who has loved in the area can't figure it out either :) New York City makes sense to me - all laid out nicely in a grid - but maybe that's just because I grew up there and it's familiar :) I had no idea where I was at any given time in Boston! But it sure is a nice town! Thanks for your helpful comments for Rita :)Susanna Leonard Hillhttp://susannahill.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1007703247358638748.post-86728566156033330842012-06-15T16:34:05.573-04:002012-06-15T16:34:05.573-04:00Hi Rita- Sorry I'm late chiming in here. I'...Hi Rita- Sorry I'm late chiming in here. I'm a maybe on this one. I like the two main characters a lot, and could see some funny situations and great illustration potential there. What's missing from the pitch, for me, is that hint of what it is in the story that complicates the situation for these two characters. I don't think you need to tell us how they solve the problem, but do need to hint at what it is. Also, see if you can liven up the language a little bit with some stronger verbs (example: Elephant chomps grass. Dolphin gobbles fish. That kind of thing.)<br /><br />Have you looked at the Elephant and Piggie stories by Mo Willems? You might want to check them out just for comparison's sake.<br /><br />Susanna, so glad you survived Boston driving! I've lived close to Boston all my life and never know in which geographical direction I'm going either. Still surviving without GPS...for now.Carrie Finisonhttp://carriefinison.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1007703247358638748.post-60301322676069080502012-06-15T06:41:02.235-04:002012-06-15T06:41:02.235-04:00Thanks for your very helpful comment for Rita, Kir...Thanks for your very helpful comment for Rita, Kirsten!Susanna Leonard Hillhttp://susannahill.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1007703247358638748.post-27516424382065034562012-06-14T23:58:59.153-04:002012-06-14T23:58:59.153-04:00Hi Rita. We love fictional stories that are ground...Hi Rita. We love fictional stories that are grounded in "facts," so I think we'd enjoy yours. I've skimmed some of the comments, but not all, so I hope I'm not repetitive. I think the key change I'd make would be to highlight the conflict. Yes, the animals are very different, but how does this present itself as obstacles the would-be friends must overcome. What happens when they try to talk to each other, share a snack, play ball? I think highlighting the conflict would give the pitch more of a hook.Kirsten Larsonnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1007703247358638748.post-6694187043750511682012-06-14T14:03:19.203-04:002012-06-14T14:03:19.203-04:00I do not like any roundabouts that I have met anyw...I do not like any roundabouts that I have met anywhere to drive in - they all seem so dangerous! but maybe it's just my driving :) Thanks for your comment for Rita!Susanna Leonard Hillhttp://susannahill.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1007703247358638748.post-11156518410216919182012-06-14T13:50:07.636-04:002012-06-14T13:50:07.636-04:00I would read it. I love elephants. The unique frie...I would read it. I love elephants. The unique friendship makes me want to see how that works. I'm so with you on Boston traffic. I like roundabouts just not in Boston. Roundabout and bears oh my!Stacysjensennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1007703247358638748.post-81639028959684280492012-06-14T09:15:16.248-04:002012-06-14T09:15:16.248-04:00They are truly wonderful, aren't they? :) So ...They are truly wonderful, aren't they? :) So helpful and generous and articulate!Susanna Leonard Hillhttp://susannahill.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1007703247358638748.post-30783732138510080132012-06-14T08:39:41.014-04:002012-06-14T08:39:41.014-04:00What wonderful people you all are. Thanks for your...What wonderful people you all are. Thanks for your comments.Ritanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1007703247358638748.post-61947153092316486152012-06-14T07:08:36.491-04:002012-06-14T07:08:36.491-04:00I know - two different and scary situations - me d...I know - two different and scary situations - me driving in Boston and a bear wandering around our house - hard to say which is worse :) Thanks for your comments for Rita.Susanna Leonard Hillhttp://susannahill.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1007703247358638748.post-66401752804817478162012-06-14T07:05:22.126-04:002012-06-14T07:05:22.126-04:00Thanks so much for your comments, Dana!Thanks so much for your comments, Dana!Susanna Leonard Hillhttp://susannahill.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1007703247358638748.post-15118937178765262922012-06-14T07:04:50.980-04:002012-06-14T07:04:50.980-04:00I know it. They're so big, and you just never...I know it. They're so big, and you just never know what they might decide to do! <br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Rena J. Traxel (unregistered) wrote, in response to Susanna Leonard Hill: <br /><br />Black bear. But still scary.<br /><br /><br />Link to commentSusanna Leonard Hillhttp://susannahill.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1007703247358638748.post-35683365764669364492012-06-14T04:03:11.245-04:002012-06-14T04:03:11.245-04:00Thank you all for your help! It has been a delight...Thank you all for your help! It has been a delight reading about your comments. I found out that mostly the problem is making the uniqie friendship stand out more. Maybe a shark should come along , I don't know. What I do know, is that the pitch needs a little pizazz and the book too needs some changing. Again thank you all for your time and great advice.Ritanoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1007703247358638748.post-69803042704349569802012-06-13T23:51:08.813-04:002012-06-13T23:51:08.813-04:00Black bear. But still scary.Black bear. But still scary.Rena J. Traxelnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1007703247358638748.post-47314805524871789322012-06-13T23:19:34.886-04:002012-06-13T23:19:34.886-04:00I would read it! I love stories about friends over...I would read it! I love stories about friends overcoming differences and adversity. I agree a little with what others have said about wanting to know a hint more about what is to come, but at the same time it's WANTING to know more that often makes me pick up a book; so leaving some things out I feel is okay. I want to know how these two very different animals figure out how to stay friends!Dana Atnipnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1007703247358638748.post-17971361053269382912012-06-13T23:15:00.122-04:002012-06-13T23:15:00.122-04:00Rita. Love the two animals you chose to be friends...Rita. Love the two animals you chose to be friends. An unlikely pair seem interesting to me. I would read it! I agree with the others though. I like Andrea's idea of adding what makes them similar or what brings them together in the first place...a zoo transporter? I don't know if that is even a kind of ship, but I do sound smart don't I? :) <br /><br />Susanna...I don't know what made my little heart pound faster....your description of the traffic and your encounters with the GPS or the bear story. Yeesh!Elizabeth Stevens Omlornoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1007703247358638748.post-30648144740922074092012-06-13T19:01:13.941-04:002012-06-13T19:01:13.941-04:00Dogs are clearly a liability where many animals ar...Dogs are clearly a liability where many animals are concerned - baby turkeys, baby deer, baby rabbits etc - but when it comes to bears I think they're helpful. I've been told bears don't like dogs and will choose to leave the area if dogs are around and barking. I hope it's true! :) Thanks for your comments for Rita.Susanna Leonard Hillhttp://susannahill.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1007703247358638748.post-68015630420869183402012-06-13T18:40:26.136-04:002012-06-13T18:40:26.136-04:00The most I've ever seen on a run is a teenage ...The most I've ever seen on a run is a teenage moose and deer. I'll pass on the bear, thanks, especially since I don't have dogs. :)<br /><br />The story sounds cute. I would read it, especially if I loved the illustrations. Yep, it always comes down to the illustrations with me and PBs.Stina Lindenblattnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1007703247358638748.post-57766248760187975452012-06-13T15:41:21.886-04:002012-06-13T15:41:21.886-04:00Even more so if you're in one of those places ...Even more so if you're in one of those places where you have to drive on the wrong side of the car! Good luck :) And thanks for your comments for Rita!Susanna Leonard Hillhttp://susannahill.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1007703247358638748.post-7762870596843608112012-06-13T15:39:44.804-04:002012-06-13T15:39:44.804-04:00OMG I know it! That word "recalculating"...OMG I know it! That word "recalculating" makes me want to stick a fork in my eye! :) Thanks for your comments for Rita!Susanna Leonard Hillhttp://susannahill.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1007703247358638748.post-80106612273704695882012-06-13T15:32:19.045-04:002012-06-13T15:32:19.045-04:00Thanks for your very helpful comments for Rita, Lo...Thanks for your very helpful comments for Rita, Lori! And yes, I like having a bear wandering around... up to a point :) Boston driving is not for me, but the city is terrific. I'd like to go back (without a car!) and visit! No one in my family is currently in college there, but we've got one looking...Susanna Leonard Hillhttp://susannahill.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1007703247358638748.post-48258430134944192632012-06-13T15:27:00.300-04:002012-06-13T15:27:00.300-04:00Grizzly or black? Ours are black. Still scary wh...Grizzly or black? Ours are black. Still scary when you meet one in the road but not like a grizzly. Mostly our won't bother you unless you make them feel threatened or cornered. Every time I've seen one it's just ambled away. Thanks for your comments for Rita!Susanna Leonard Hillhttp://susannahill.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1007703247358638748.post-88545306805729619782012-06-13T15:17:35.419-04:002012-06-13T15:17:35.419-04:00Hmmm.... you may have something there Coleen! Or ...Hmmm.... you may have something there Coleen! Or maybe UnBEARable :) Thanks for your comment for Rita!Susanna Leonard Hillhttp://susannahill.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1007703247358638748.post-87354515682368082002012-06-13T15:16:00.351-04:002012-06-13T15:16:00.351-04:00We've been told that black bears travel in a 5...We've been told that black bears travel in a 50 mile radius, and that seems about right. They seem to pass through on weekly basis rather than daily. At least one is tagged with a yellow tag in his ear. This one appears to have a foot or leg injury of some kind because my daughter said he was lame :( Poor guy. And you know from my posts last year, they will get in the garbage any chance they get so we're very careful. Thanks for your comments for Rita :)Susanna Leonard Hillhttp://susannahill.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.com